Yes I know. It's Feburary. This is supposed to be a blog on resolutions and sticking to them yadda yadda. See last years :p

I want to write about my beliefs. Yes I know, this is a subject I bat about quite freely on here however, this time it's different. Instead of umming and ahing over what I might and might not believe in. I will tell you.

I believe in a God and a Goddess. I believe in the elements. I am beginning to believe in a type of magick.

Tonight I did a mini ritual. One I'd wanted to do for a while to see how I felt doing any kind of witchcraft. And I have to say, that it felt perfectly natural and normal and me. Although I jumbled my words a little it went as planned. And I was very excited by that.

Ok, lets flash back to the weekend. Saturday I received my copy of Cauldron Born by Damh the Bard. British Pagan Folk music at it's finest. He's one artist I will never download (partly because it's stupidly hard to find!). So I uploaded this CD to my iPod and I went for a walk, in the sun, to town. I took my camera and snapped away quite happily on my way to Leamington, the trees, the birds, the light through bushes, nature in this urban environment. I was happy. I love nature, and I make no secret of that. Listening to Damh as I took wonder at the world around my awoke a little voice inside I hadn't heard in a while. One which filled me with energy and I have to say it took a lot to not dance down the street.

But I returned home, and although I still had Damh in my head and was still pretty "high" from nature it all died down a little.

Until Sunday. I was looking up Open University Courses then remembered some of the ones I downloaded from the iTunesU and decided to nose at what I had. I looked in religion, surprised I had downloaded anything there, and was even more surprised to find that what was in there was largely pagan. I had a video on a Wiccan Ceremony, one of a Village Witch and one of 3 different religions in Glastonbury including the Goddess group.So I watched the Wiccan Ritual. Normally I feel like I'm cringing when I watch things like this, but this time I didn't. I saw a ceremony, beautiful (although some of the people looked a bit stern for a celebration...), surrounded by nature and nothing about it was weird or over the top. I watched the Village Witch and saw a normal person being a Witch as business. Collecting herbs and plants in the forests, creating a charm for a home. It was simple, none of this ceremonial nonsense. Then the Goddess group from Glastonbury, finding a temple I now deeply desire to visit.

I did sit and stop and think. I felt as though something inside me had clicked. I don't know where or when or what or how. Something inside me had clicked and everything I had just seen wasn't freakish, bizarre and oddly supernatural. It was natural. It was a celebration of life, nature, ourselves, the Lord and Lady, the Sun and Moon and Sky, the Land and Sea. I spent some time with my nose in magazines and books, looking at bits and pieces and feeling a deep connection with it all.

That night I went onto Second Life. Not something I make a habit out of, but I happened to know that Sundays are the night for a "Wicca Introduced" course run by the Children of Artemis group on there. So I popped along, and although I was having computer issues I managed to stay for the class. It was on protection, they talked about spells and amulets and magic. Now I have spent some of these classes not really feeling what the teacher (Merlyn) was saying. I felt distant from the topics as though I didn't really connect. This was different. I took in every word that was said, I understood and I felt like it was something I could really do.

And so I sat tonight in my circle, thanking the God and Goddess for being and for blessing me with their presence. When I closed the circle down I felt, renewed. I felt like this was missing from me for a while, that it's a lost part of me that has just come home. I want to make it become a bigger part of my life. Not just the Witchcraft, that will come as and when I feel it is appropriate, but sitting in a sacred space, connecting with deity, both out and inside. Meditating and feeling the elements. To practice visualisation and become better in knowing.

Now I finally feel that my path has found me, I want to make a real concious effort in learning about it properly, the history, the correspondences, the lore, the myths and legends. I want to learn new ways of connecting with the God and Goddess and I want it to be part of my every day life.

Finally, I'm comfortable.

Finally...

I'm me.


Blessed Be )O(